The Hidden Costs of Stress

iStock_000001650831SmallSooooo… After falling off the face of the Earth for about 8 weeks, I’m back!

I think I could fill a book with everything that happened in those weeks. But suffice to say – it was a rough period of many personal changes for me.  I spent the last 2 or 3 weeks catching up with my life and I’m only just getting back into the groove of things.

I’m getting back to writing, and I realized quite quickly – stress is expensive.

Food budget, what food budget?

Readers will remember how I love harping about my $100 grocery budget.  Well guess what? When you’re feeling down or facing a crisis, the grocery budget goes out the window. I craved comfort foods and quick fixes.  Suddenly, junk food and take out seems a lot more appealing than home cooked meals and healthy snacks. I think I blew through about $400 in food and groceries for December alone and kept the pace going for most of January.

Bills?  Meh…

Then there were the bills, and the to-dos… Because let’s face it, being sad makes everything else seem less important.  In a way, it kind of reinforces the things that are actually important in life. However, bills do need to get paid and obligations need to be fulfilled.  I ended up neglecting quite a few things and had to spend a lot of time and a bit of money fixing them.

Then there was the shopping therapy…

I spent $275 on a new haircut and colour and another $95 on new clothes.  The shirts were on sale by the way.  :p  And while I do look fabulous with my new hair cut, I probably should have waited another month or two before spending the money.

And some costs don’t have a dollar value

At home, I neglected my friends and family.  I didn’t even go home for the Lunar New Year.  It was the first New Years that I’ve missed in my 29 years on this planet, and I’m pretty sure I’ve now been branded The Bad Asian Daughter.

And quite frankly, I still don’t feel quite like myself.  It’s unsettling to go through some very large changes and not quite recognize yourself on the other side. Where is the drive and motivation? Where are my to-do lists and plans?

Keeping busy is my solution – fake it till you make it, right?  I will continue with my little projects, my writing, my work… I dug up all my favourite music and I am plugged in all day, keeping my mind busy. I look at condos and save up my money and make my investments.  All the things that make me, me. Sometimes it feels a little pointless now, like sprinting for a finish line when no one is watching.

But what else can we do but move on?

So let’s reconnect… 🙂  I’ve missed the first month and a half of 2014!

Posted in: Philosophy

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